I was unable to complete the poem I was preparing for this week's prompt, so I am going to pull something out of the archives. I know that it isn't very good, but I am working on keeping some sort of routine in my life no matter what.
------------------------------------------
Marriage
Looking up at him from her makeshift sickbed
On their faded living-room couch
As he strode through the front door,
His arms filled with her favorite comfort foods
From the Asian market
(Egg rolls, shrimp fried rice, and Darjeeling tea),
She almost forgot that she hadn't loved him
On the day she agreed to marry him
Two years ago.
She wasn't sure even now
After all these months of fixing his meals
starching his uniforms
cleaning his house
And letting him brush her long midnight black hair
(Which soothed him late at night
When he was worried about bills),
What love really was
And whether she felt it for him;
But as she watched him
Standing in their tidy blue-and-white kitchen
The brow of his somewhat ordinary face
Furrowed intently
As he tried to remember how to brew the tea,
A warmth spread through her body
That no passion could induce
And she instinctively knew
That she was safe.
Certainly that was just as good as love,
Wasn't it?
--Dani Sanders, 01 October 1990
6 comments:
while you say it isn'y one of your best, I have to disagree. It is so real to me. So relevant.
As for routine, I'm with you there. If I stop...I fear I'll stop for good...and that I don't think I could bear.
Thanks, Wendylou. I was happy with it when I wrote it, but now it sounds like one big run-on sentence to me.
Consistency has always been a problem with me. I'm hoping that being consistent with my blog posts will eventually transfer to other areas of my life.
Dani, you have a lot of great lines here. And I like the conflict between the internal and external selves.
There's nothing wrong with revising an older poem. You may want to fool with it and see where it leads.
Nice job.
Good work. Your poem is full of life's everyday things while masking a deeper meaning. I like it.
bd
I love this poem! it speaks to me with its almost painful honesty and it tells me a beautiful story. I love the details - the husband concentrating on how to make the tea - it's kinda sweet and very, very real. It's got a very attractive voice to it.
I think it's a fabulous poem! So often it's the little things that make you realise how you really feel about someone. Thanks for sharing it.
Post a Comment